Activities To Stop Teasing Before It Goes Too Far

How often have you heard, “I was just teasing,” coming from the mouth of an elementary school student?  It is an innocent enough phrase, but left unchecked, teasing could turn into its nasty close relative, bullying.  It’s only a matter of time and practice.

Teasing includes making fun of someone, name calling, using put-downs, or ridicule.  Bullying can take the form of repetitive physical, verbal, or psychological abuse – gesturing, hitting, pushing, shoving, insulting, or excluding.  As you can see, teasing is a springboard into the stronger acts of bullying.

Your child could be the bully, the bullied, or the innocent bystander.  Whatever the case may be, they will find themselves involved. They could be a friend, an accomplice, the one who helps incite an incident, or the one who helps to diffuse it.

Here are some helpful activities you can use as discussion starters with your child to help guide them in the right direction.

1. Define Teasing – Write the word “Teasing” at the top of a piece of paper.  Ask them to explain what teasing means.  Write their ideas down on the paper.  Ask them how they would feel if they were teased, and if they ever saw anyone being teased, how they think they felt.  Ask them if they ever told someone to stop teasing a classmate.

2. Tease Dance – play some dance music and when the music stops they have to freeze.  Give an example of what a teaser would say or do and then ask your child to say something positive. “A teaser makes fun of other people’s clothes.”  When they say something positive – “There’s nothing wrong with her clothes –she looks fine.” – start the music again. More teaser comments…

a. You can’t sit here with us

b. You dance funny

c. You’re a loser, a dummy, a teacher’s pet, etc…

3. What should we do? – Make three small signs “walk away,” “stand up for yourself,” and “get help.”  Give the signs to your child and then tell them to pick the one they think they should do during the situations you describe.

a. Gillian and Lindsay pretend to be monsters and always creep up behind Sophia and make loud “monster” noises, which frighten her.  It happens every day during recess and upsets Sophia.  What should she do?

b. Tommy, Bobby and Freddy sit at the same table every day for lunch.  If Steven tries to join them they either take his food or damage it.  What should he do?

c. Donna calls Kayla names when they sit near each other in math.  Barbara hears what Donna says.  Sometimes Barbara wants to laugh about it, but sometimes it bothers her.  What should she do?

4. No Innocent Bystanders – Again make three signs (or you can use stuffed animals or puppets).  Give your child three choices – Do nothing, laugh, or join in the teasing, then tell this story – “Every day Shelley calls Samantha a baby because she once saw Samantha cry about not knowing an answer in class.  In fact, the whole class saw Samantha cry that day.”  Which action or inaction would your child choose?

Afterward, ask your child how they would feel if someone watched them being teased and did nothing, or laughed, or joined in the teasing.  Help them understand that being a “bystander” is unacceptable.  Talk about what they could do if they see someone being teased – tell the person to stop the teasing – ask an adult to help.